Excerpt: Tea time talk

Scene: Staff canteen at iitb. Five mtech1 cse students, who, ofcourse look tired and drained, enter the canteen through the backdoor..err door near the rear end. Apparently they have completed algorithms quiz and are here to unwind. Three of them reach for a table and the other two head towards the cashier.

Pre script:To aid hindi handicapped direct translation to english is provided in brackets

stud1:char chai aur ek bread bonda (four tea and one bread bonda)
cashier:LINE MEIN AAWOON (line in come)
stud2: yahaanpe line be hein kya ?(here line also present ?)

they go stand behind a group of girls ....no, our innocent heroes had no evil intentions..but they just joined a queue which moved like a cloud..
they wait patiently till the girls decide what to buy..
stud2: ek chai key liye ithna wait karna padtha hein kya? (one tea for so much wait do what?)
meanwhile the other three students are looking in the direction of these two and having a hearty laugh.. and finally the girls get the token and move on..which creates a big void...promptly filled by other customers..
stud1: are yar queue ka kya hoowan? (oh friend queue what happened?)
stud2: yein nahi janthe hein ke queue ka mathlab first in first out hothahein..they must attend data structure class..hehehe (these no know that queue mean first in first out that..hehehe)
stud1: hehehe (hehehe)

finally when everyone else is done they get their chance
stud1:char chai aur ek bread bonda (four tea and one bread bonda)
cashier:LINE MEIN AAWOON (Line in come)
{oopss...erase the previous line..a copy paste problem}

they pay the cashier and head towards the tea stall
stud1:char chai aur ek bread bonda (four tea and one bread bonda)
{aahha...I was carefull this time}

chaiwala: DOO COFFEE (two coffee..ignoring our hapless heroes)
stud1:char chai aur ek bread bonda (four tea and one bread bonda)
chaiwala: TEEN CHAI AUR EK COFFEE(still ignoring...three tea and one coffee)
stud2: iska scheduling algorithm teek nahin hein..ise OS ka class attend karna tha..hahaha (his scheduling algo correct not..he OS's class attend done..hahaha)
stud1: hahaha

the chaiwala cannot understand our heroes tongue but figures out that he is the butt of their joke
(with a confused- angry look)chaiwala: kya chahein (what want?)
stud1:char chai aur ek bread bonda (four tea and one bread bonda)


he fills four plastic cups with hot brown water and dumps it at them with such force that half of the contents spill over..finally our heroes collect their grub and go to the table...
leaving behind all the nasty things in true iitian spirit..they move on to discuss something good..
stud3: quiz katam hone ke bad..you feel relaxed..as though you have accomplished something..(quiz over after..)
stud4: kal subhein tak..uske badh ..you will start with new assignment (tomorrow morning till..that after...)
stud5: dhek yein aisa hein..koyi doobne walla uper aake sans leithe hein..aur oske badh phir..blug blug blug (see it like is..somene drowning up come breath take..and that after again..blug blug blug)
stud2: finally doobna he hein..hahaha(finally drown must..hahaha)
stud1:hahaha
stud3:hahaha
stud4:hahaha
stud5:hahaha

disclaimer: this reporter is also hindi handicapped...so the conversation presented here maynot match the actual one..all attempts have been made to retain the spirit of the conversation.

ummm..whats up Doc?

Why do Doctors 'use' such bad writing?Yeah, I am referring to the people in white coat whom you visit when you are so ill that you can not visit anyone else. Tell me, my friend, why do you think Docs writing resemble chicken tracks?

Here is my guess. They dont know what they are writing, thats why!!!You think it is an absurd claim? well read on..
The Doc examines you, maintaining a safe distance all the while, he can not possibly put his finger on which one of those zillions of ailments having the same three common symptoms of cold,cough and fever is troubling you, so he decides to treat the symptoms instead and well....having solved the problem to this extent (have we solved something?) now the Doc is faced with the difficult task of actually prescribing medicine. The Doc thinks"hmmm..let me think..I remember reading in 3rd year pharmacology..there is an antipyrtic which starts with C..has a Z somewhere in between and I guess ends with ENY, yeah i remember that because it rhymed with my girlfriend's nick name, saala..poora naam yaad nahin aa raha hein!!I am sure if I scratch my head I can recollect the name, but I cannot scratch my head in front of the patient!! So, I will let the Pharmacist do the thinking, yes!! that is what I am going to do. I will scribble whatever I can remember and let him fill in the blanks. Saala usse tho patha hona chahiye, after all he studied it for three years."
let me save some typing by saying 'what follows is obvious'.

Hmm..not convinced yet? Well, think about this. They have gone through the same kind of 'professional' education as you and I, agree? yeah, it may be a bit different, but still the learning approach would be similar. Now, tell me what is the formula for mean in Gaussian distribution? You dont know it, do you? When you cannot remember something that you read in 'x'th sem Math (assuming you did not drop it as choice question, and yeah, I dont know in which sem did we have it) how can you expect your Doc to ....(again what follows is obvious)

So, my friend, my advice to you is this. It doesnt matter which doctor do you go to , but always buy the medicines from the best pharmacist. Make sure he is a gold medalist, never compromise on that.

I hate to be treated as a 'resource', I really do.You may be a big stud in your own right, but that doesnt make me nothing. I dont expect to be consulted, but atleast I should be informed about decisions that are taken about this resource that is me.
oh well..

Towers of hanoi(orange)

My room (14, H6) is an amazing place. This room measuring 9' X 7' is the confluence of signals from four different mobile towers of Orange (I see a title! I see a title!). How do I know? well... the cell info display option. If I hold the mobile near the table in my room, I get IIT Powai E , just move two steps to the right, wow, it changed to Powai B, now go 3 steps backwards, voila, you have Powai D, and move a bit to the left, hmmm, what do you expect? Powai C? no, actually the mobile has lost all the signals (there, gotcha!)..so how is the count of towers four..well i lied a bit!!to catch signals from fourth tower, I have to just stand outside the room and i get signals from hiranandani tower!

Ok, my room receives signals from four towers(yes , I insist it is four!), so what is the big deal? The point of all this cribbing is that no signal strongly dominates the signals from other towers, the effect of which are conversations that go like this

me:hellooo..
otherend : chuusshh..beep..chusshhh..
me: hellooo..kelistha illa..
otherend: CHUSSHHH..BEEEP..CHUSSHH (louder, this time)
me:HELLOOO..naanu ache hogthine..
otherend:gooosshhh...
(i go out of the room)
me: eega
otherend: helloooo..
me: heLi..kelistha idhe..
otherend: helooooo...
me:HELLOOOOO..HELI..
otherend:oh cut agi hoithu ..thu!
me:HELLOO..HELLOOO..CUT AGILLA..
otherend:..beep..beep...beep..
by the time i complete this one sided communication, people from adjacent rooms have come out at the loud noises in a strange tongue(ok... this is a figment of my imagination)

So this is the problem of towers of orange.. any solutions?